For starters, I just wanted to say thank you SO MUCH for this blog. Working at Pencils has severely affected my mind, to the point where I hate mankind even more than when I worked in fast food (On grill duty- the nastiest place). It's ironic I find people who share my views right after I receive title of associate of the month... "Title," being key word, as I have yet to receive a gift card or a pin for my name tag. I've been working here for... holy crap 9 months... please, kill me....
I'm primarily cashier, but I am the go-to person if there is no OS. OS in my store is combined with Furniture, for maximum physical labor at minimum wage. Generally, I like my coworkers. We got a new general manager a couple months after my arrival, and he was a complete dickheaded prick to me the first few months he was here. I ended up reporting him and shortly after that and he stopped bullying me. We also have the manager who does all the paper work, who is the easiest of everyone to pick on, because of his selective narcolepsy. He is infamous for taking naps in the back office while he's supposed to be doing shit. I heard from an older ex-associate that they once posted picture of him asleep and the manager ended up making the entire team stay in the store until 1am because nobody fessed up to the prank.
Being a cashier is probably one of the most boring jobs in the world. It's also a huge pain in the ass, because we get pushed to sell plans about as much as our EasyWrecks do. The more they try forcing me to sell more the less I really give a fuck. Rarely do I bother to even offer a plan to a customer, because I still have my dignity, and it really does hurt inside to get rejected, despite the fact that you are obligated to ask. I really wish that customers realized that we don't have a choice. We are now also getting paid a dollar a prp... REALLY? A fucking dollar? I could sell a $50 prp on a kindle, or a $10 on a phone and only make 2 dollars extra? Fuck off. Other people get commission, me? I don't even get enough money to buy an expired candy bar at the shit hole I work at, since a candy bar is $1.19 here.
Oh, and another thing; bonuses. CPC has them. EasyWreck has them. I understand why cashiers don't have them, since cashiers seem disposable here, but why the fuck not office supplies OR furniture?! The people who really bust their fucking asses lifting furniture, handling most of the store (In this particular store) and pick up the slack on days where we have a slow cashier on duty. When I got here, the most experienced people were all in OS, and now the store has had so many different people in and out of every department. In OS, you're not as pressured to sell plans, but they expect you to be fucking superman, finishing load when you're being called up every five fucking minutes to be a cashier.
It's true, we do get a lot of fucking retards here at Pencils. I've even taken to making a list of all the things I hate about them on sticky notes when we aren't busy. Allow me to list some of them off to you :)
- I am not your maid, so put your baskets & amp; carts back when you're done, lazy fuck.
- If you plan on writing a check, bring your own fucking pen, or buy one. Don't rudely take one out of my pencil holder without asking.
- Don't open the packages on the shelf unless you intend on buying it. It's fucking rude and you should be able to decide if it's what you need or not without vandalizing our shit.
- Comprehend the idea that Pencils employees are not superheros, and that you will need to actually wait your turn, like normal people. It's first come, first serve, don't like it, fuck off and get out.
- Just because we work at Pencils doesn't mean we'll advocate for them and purposely try taking all of your money for our own amusement. You don't have any right or reason to bitch at me, a cashier, because I can't refund your expired coupon, or because I offered you a prp when my manager was standing in earshot and would bitch at me otherwise.
- The customers who come into the store get help quicker than those who call. If you don't like being on hold for 20 minutes because our store is understaffed, get off of your fat lazy ass and come in to the store; it burns more calories than bitching.
- DO NOT by any means expect cashiers to know everything. Many of them have little/no experience in OE and OS and therefore wouldn't know where jack shit is in the store (Or know much about CPC stuff).
- Don't blurt out your fucking phone number to me when you arrive at my register, before even asking for rewards. Wait politely, shit head. I really wish you lazy fucks would carry those cards, it's stupid when you make me go through twenty phone numbers, or look over my shoulder and ask "Can you look it up by name?" NO ASSHOLE, I CAN'T, BECAUSE I'M GETTING PAID MINIMUM WAGE. Seriously, do you fucktards realize how many times I hear this quote in a day: "I have rewards, but I don't have the card with me." I just wish I could look into all of your eyes and say, "TOO FUCKIN' BAD THEN!"
- Don't get mad if we can't find what you're looking for because of your horrid half-assed description.
- NO, we can't search to see if you have unredeemed rewards because you're lazy and couldn't print them out at home.
- I'm sorry the product your purchased rang up at the wrong price, but since I can't physically check the price tag to see if you're trying to bullshit me, you're gonna have to wait until one of my lazy and/or deaf coworkers decides to show up and check for me so you can save your whopping 80 cents.
- Don't make shit up to associates or managers when you're too stupid to understand that our PRPs aren't through Staples. We gave you that fugly ass brochure in hopes that humankind would evolve and READ it.
Sorry this post is rather long, but after so many months of repressed anger working at this shit hole, I feel better knowing I'm not alone and other stores really are shitty like mine :)